Saturday, November 17, 2007

Deer Widow Blues

The guitar strums a steady beat and cigarette smoke drifts in clouds above my head. A half-empty bottle of whiskey sits on a stool near by. The children clap in rhythm and shout out," Work it, Mama!" and "Sing it sweet, sister!" and "That no-good buck shooter sure done you wrong, lady!"

Mr. D's safely disposed of
We rented Shrek the Third.
We ate bagels and mac and cheese
Chicken nuggets and ice cream.
Mr. T did his homework, Mr. G painted and drew

We got the blues.
The deer hunting blues.
We got the bright orange stay behind 'cuz daddy's in the north woods blues.

Went to family class at karate
Learned to break choke holds
Mr. B wore his Spidey suit
I talked on the phone
And now we're staying inside 'cuz it got so damn cold.

We got the blues.
The deer hunting blues.
We got the bright orange stay behind 'cuz daddy's in the north woods blues.



It's harsh to say this, but life's actually easier when Mr. D's not around. Oh, we like him. Really. He's a great guy. It's just, well, if I'm the only adult around, I don't have to account for his tastes, schedule, preferences and so forth. I get to make all the decisions with only the children to consider. I like all that power.

And most importantly? I have full command of the remote in our bedroom after Team Testosterone goes to bed.

Last night Bravo was showing early Eddie Murphy from his Raw days. I've always been a fan, even though he's mellow now and family friendly and sings. But old Eddie? That's some "bleep bleep bleep Mother-bleeping bleep." Bravo silenced all the profanity so there were huge chunks of his lips moving while everyone laughed. However I knew which foul words he used since I'd memorized entire sketches back in the 80's when I first fell in love with him.

Someday my kids will come across Raw or 48 Hours or Beverly Hills Cop and it will freak them out. They will look at each other with jaws dropped and say, "NO WAY is this the dude from Daddy Day Care and Dr. Doolittle. I only hope I'm around to enjoy the moment.

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