Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Seizures and Wandering

Seizures: a sudden change in behavior characterized by changes in sensory perception (sense of feeling) or motor activity (movement) due to an abnormal firing of nerve cells in the brain
On the Epilepsy Front with Mr. T: we met with the pediatric neurologist this morning and discovered that the Wicked Expensive Pills are in fact working like a dream and he is SEIZURE FREE! (The echo effect is me still yelling that from my rooftop.) All his test results came back in the "excellent" to "normal" range and we will "maintain the current course of treatment" for one year. In 12 months we'll try taking him off the meds with a huge prayer that he has outgrown the seizures.

I asked the doctor about Mr. T's school woes. I learned that a seizure is one manifestation of neurological trouble in the brain. Learning disabilities are another. BUT his problems could still conceivably be caused by the seizures interrupting his learning in 1st and 2nd grade. So, in the words of the Current Occupant, we'll "stay the course" until we discover it's not working. Unlike the Current Occupant, I'll dismiss my plans if they prove ineffective.

travelling about without any clear destination
I hate this word and writers use it TOO DAMN MUCH when they write. "Bill wandered to the fridge and picked out a soda." "Zoe wandered into the studio and sat down to paint." "They wandered for hours and talked about their plans." People do NOT wander. Unless they are toddlers or suffering dementia. Cattle may wander onto someone's property. A small child may wander into a restricted area. But anyone over the age of five MOVES WITH INTENTION. I am sick and freaking tired of reading books where the characters WANDER. They may walk, stroll, run, hike, amble, go, move, pass, pace, hoof, tread, ambulate, step, saunter, ramble, prominade, browse, or otherwise relocate themselves through space in a book. "Wander" means to move without intent.

Henceforth, when I come across this word in a book, I shall highlight it in bright yellow and offer my editorial suggestions in the margin before sending it back to the author. I'll call this is "Project to Eradicate Wandering in Fiction," P.E.W.F. Join the crusade. Help characters obtain intention and motivation as they move through scenes in books everywhere. Convince writers everywhere to use better verbs.


  1. Glad to hear about your good news - Seizure Free is excellent.

    and I'll help you with wandering if you help me with "literally"

  2. um, I agree completely. Unless I use that word. Then I think you're dead wrong. Only kidding.

    In all seriousness, please go polish your toenails. Bad polish is better than no polish. I do prefer "polish" to "paint" as the verb in that sentence. Seems girlier.

  3. When you are over 60 you will wander into a room and wonder why you are in the room in the first place!! Glad you had such good news at the Doctors--I guess expensive pills are better than no pills!!

  4. I'm SO GLAD the meds are working for the boy!

    I'll join your fight. Also, please help me seek out those people who use apostrophes to make words plural and MAKE THEM STOP.

  5. I'll take seizure-free any day. Yay, for the good news!


Spill it, reader.