Wednesday, January 14, 2009

gut wrench

Yesterday morning I was helping Mr. T get ready for another day of 4th grade education--he was in the laundry room pulling on shoes when his father pulled in the drive. Mr. T shoved his arms into his coat sleeves, assembled his hat and mittens. Mr. D honked his car horn. Mr. T slid the backpack onto his back and I wished him good day. "Have a great day, buddy. I love you." I watched him walk towards the door leading to the garage and to Mr. D waiting to drop him at school. I shut the pocket door between the laundry rooom and kitchen and waited a beat. Then two. Then three. I should have heard a door open and close. Silence.

I yanked the pocket door open again and saw Mr. T standing stock still in front of the door. "What are you doing? Get moving! Go!" I yelled. He shook himself into action and headed out. I continued with my day.

Skip to the afternoon where I coach Mr. T through 4th grade homework after a snack. We're hunched over a math worksheet--estimation and multiplication--and he suddenly freezes up and stops working--stops thinking, stops calculating, stops writing, stops everything. Just sits still and stares off into space. My temper flared at him.

Too late I realized his seizures are back.

30 comments:

  1. I am so sorry. It must be gut wrenching...thinking he may be able to go about his day without needing medication...only to find out it is still needed.

    My thoughts and prayers are with your family.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Damn. Poor boy. I am so very sorry.

    Sending hugs and love up your way.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm sorry to hear this. Sending good thoughts your way.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Guess it is good that there are meds that will help him and you are able to get them for him. Life is not fair--but you can handle it..

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm so sorry to hear this. I'll add him to my prayer list tonight.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Been there. Thank goodness the little ones are able to move on and forget our slips when we hug and apologize for our temper flares. Now if WE could just move on past the guilt.
    Wish I could take back a hundred HEY! What are you doing? Let's go!s.

    Hang in there. There is still time for the seizures to right themselves like the doctor said they might. Sending virtual hugs your way.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh no! I'm so sorry. You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh no - I'm so sorry. I know this isn't what you were hoping for. Thoughts and prayers to you all.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I think you figured it out pretty quickly. Please don't beat yourself up--we're all only human.

    ReplyDelete
  10. No no!

    I'm so sorry. -sigh- I was hopeful it was done, for both of your sakes.

    Well, I'll keep you guys in my prayers. You're a good mom (don't doubt that.)

    - MM

    ReplyDelete
  11. You and your family are in my prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh no. I'm sorry.
    But he still has time to grow out of them. He is young.
    Hang in there!
    Prayers for you both.

    ReplyDelete
  13. So sorry to hear it. I was hoping he'd do all right without the meds. The good news is that you know you can get him back on track--and try again another day.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I haven't been reading your blog for long, but I'm so sorry to hear about this. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Sorry to hear about Mr. T.....sending hugs your way from your front yard.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oh. So sorry to hear this. Hard on both of you - no, all of you.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Oh sweetheart. I'm so sorry. So very, very sorry. Just like my little sister. __hugs__ to you and to your little boy.

    (By the way, we often think we're at fault for behaving normally. Normal is what you expected, therefore, it drove your reaction. Please do not let this get you down.)

    ReplyDelete
  18. I'm so very sorry for you and your son! I'll be thinking of you guys. And don't be too hard on yourself!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Ohhhhhhhhhh... so sad.... this tugs at my heart, Melissa. My thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I am so sorry. I was just thinking that everything must be going well since there had been no news. Until I read that he was just stopped outside the door, and my stomache gave the little lurch that turned into a much larger lurch as I continued reading. My prayers are with you and your young mister.

    ReplyDelete
  21. My heart hurt when I read this...I'm really sorry.

    Don't be too hard on yourself.

    You're a great mom, and Mr.T's so very lucky to have you.

    ReplyDelete
  22. What a blow; the no meds thing seemed to be working. Glad you caught it quickly. Love and hugs to your boy.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Oh no!!!
    Now what?
    I'm so sorry :(

    ReplyDelete
  24. How were you controlling them before? I'd suppose the primary thought is his safety. Had a friend who did that and she was fine, everyone knew what was happening, very popular girl.
    They must have better meds for that now.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I know you were holding your breath hoping for the best.Just like eurolush my heart hurt when I read this.Know that you and your family are in my thoughts.I am sorry that you and he have to go through this again.Please keep us informed on what his doctor says.Maybe it's not as bad as it seems.

    Lots of hugs to you from me!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Oh, honey. I'm so sorry. Thinking of you and your darling boy...

    ReplyDelete

Spill it, reader.