In this parallel universe where I try to design a snake costume for Mr. G, I've asked Mr. T and Mr. B what they want to be for Halloween. For the first year ever we have NOBODY going as Batman which makes me sort of sad. Mr. B wants to be a "bone dude" (ummm, do you mean 'skeleton?' yeah, thought so.) and Mr. T wants to be a vampire. "Like Dracula or a vampire?" (I'm thinking of a biker jacket in the basement--long story--will NOT go there--and how totally kewl my oldest would look as a Blade-style vampire) "Dracula. He's, like, the head vampire and the most powerful so I want to be him."
So faux blood, slicked hair and fangs it is. But we can use last year's Headless Horseman costume with minor modifications.
Meanwhile, Mr. G and Mr. B built giant towers and robots out of blocks and lined up rows of Rescue Heroes and weaponry in the hall outside their room. Getting past this defense is nearly impossible/impassible, and I asked if we couldn't move the entire squadron into the playroom. "Nope. It's so we can hear if anyone comes in our room at night." "But what if you need to get out?" "We won't."
Predictably, at 3:00 a.m. I awoke to falling blocks and clattering plastic--Mr. G had to go to the bathroom and crashed through the entire defense. Naturally, Mr. B slept soundly through the chaos. Mr. G got so freaked out by the obstacle course in the hallway, he backtracked, peed his jammies and changed clothes before returning to bed.
After waking up with a headache and rousing my spawn, I asked Mr. T about the notation at the bottom of his assignment notebook. "What's this about 'white sheets?'" "I don't know." "Well, is it white sheets of paper or white fabric like a white bedsheet?" "No idea. Why don't we just put a white sheet in my backpack?" "Of paper or of fabric?" Mr. T shrugs. "Could that maybe refer to the white progress report I had to sign?" "Where is that?" "I signed it and put it in your folder in your backpack." "Yeah, that's probably it."
I start the washing machine and recite my mantra: KAF. KAF. KAF.*
*Kids Are Fun.