Tuesday, May 18, 2010

I didn't embellish any part of this post

Mr. B came home from school yesterday and began enthusiastically and determinedly digging a giant hole. Mr. G soon joined him, and then Mr. T got into the action. When they finally dropped their shovels last night, two kids could fit in the hole. I'll have to take a picture of their project when they're done. Apparently this dig was inspired by a dinosaur unit in 1st grade.

As a baseball widow (a shout out to Clemson Girl who has it worse than me--her husband coaches college), I'm running ragged getting Team Testosterone to karate classes, Boy Scouts, baseball and soccer. We ate on the go at our favorite greasy Chinese chopstick joint (as opposed to a "greasy spoon joint") and took our Chinese doughnuts (holy clogged arteries, Batman!) with us. I've got no business touching the doughnuts, I'm not in the dojo much lately. While driving home between karate classes and picking up Mr. T from Boy Scout CPR training, I saw a package of Thomas English Muffins along the side of the road. Curious.

About a half mile later I passed a 5 # sack of potatoes on the center line of the road. Curiouser.

A mile later I drove by the fresh carcass of a huge raccoon. Roadkill eating with two sides--it doesn't get much better, does it?

Then the boys didn't finish their Chinese Doughnuts because we have to work on our hole. I put the package on the kitchen counter and put away the groceries. Then I went out to help Mr. D (now home from last night's loss) work on batting practice with the boys. I chased down the balls the boys missed and piled them behind the "backstop" while he worked the pitching machine. An idyllic moment--Midwest family playing baseball on a grassy (and dandelion-y) back yard while the sun sets. Mr. B was at bat and Mr. D asked me to toss one of the balls back to him. I threw the ball--smack--right into Mr. B's right cheek. He began to cry, I felt like a total jerk, all the fun of the evening was ruined just like that because Mama can't throw a ball for crap. Fortunately I throw like a girl and he didn't even have a bruise on his face when he woke up this morning. I'm still not in the running for Mom of the Year, people.

This morning I discovered the torn remains of a sugar-and-grease-coated paper bag with granulated sugar scattered all over the countertop and floor. Guess who loooooves Chinese Doughnuts? Yep, Violet our Semi-Stray Cat.

For a girl who doesn't get out much, I sure saw a lot of strange stuff yesterday.


  1. I nearly spit out my coffee over the roadkill with two sides comment.
    Not in the running for Mom of the Year?! My kids would beg to differ. They would dearly love to dig a hole to China, and if there were potential dinosaurs along the way, so much the better! Their mother is mean and (worse) blames the Evil Homeowners' Association for not letting them have such a glorious adventure.

  2. LMAO @ roadkill with two sides!!!

  3. And lookee there - you have some nice dandelion greens readily available to provide the veggie portion of your roadkill feast!

  4. I'm glad I had put the coffee down before Roadkill With 2 Sides.

    My brain was thinking the English Muffins had a meeting..."I'll say 1...2...3...and we'll all jump at the same time"

  5. There is nothing like a game of long toss in the backyard on a spring evening--it was a factor in the house we bought; it had a nice, wide back yard. It's not just for boys either--the girls loved it, too.

    My high school kids are quite impressed with my speed and accuracy when tossing candy to them.

  6. *heehee! omg...for a picture of your cat with her face in a bag of doughnuts...I love it!

    softball = $10
    catcher's mitt = $12.50
    nailing your kid in the face with the ball with no trip to the hospital = priceless!!


  7. OMG...dying with laughter at the roadkill with two sides comment!!!

  8. My girls would love it if I'd let them dig a huge hole in our yard.

  9. So, is Team Testosterone digging for dinosaurs? And did you ever find out where the trail of food came from?

    Very strange stuff indeed!

  10. All that and it's not even a full moon ;)

    We too have a giant hole in our back yard...the boys started it and the dog have taken to helping the cause. Riley has a nice bruise on the side of his face from Jim tossing him a ball on Sunday! Gotta love baseball season;)

  11. Oh come on people - are you telling me you have NEVER put a bag of groceries on top of you car and then driven off leaving various and sundry items on the road in your wake? Oh…me either! ;)

  12. those days help us to know what good days are, right? ha. at least you can find humor in things like this. or is it just us?

  13. Phew! How do you coordinate all that running around!!! So much to do, so little time, but your family sound so fun that there wasn't a hint of complaining in your post. LOVE THAT!

    Have a great rest of the week,

  14. we may walk back and check out the dinosaur hole this evening after supper, if we see the Momvan home and hear boys running about.

    Just as long as I'm home and settled for NPH on GLEE!!!! (squeeee!)

    and roadkill, potatoes, and english muffins? wonderfully funny!!!

  15. I don't like to throw balls at my boys either because I'm always afraid of hitting them, like Mr. Woodcock.

  16. Oh my gosh that is so funny!

  17. Roadkill with two sides - could this be a common sight on Wisconsin roads?

  18. Along the cliffs here, it's called the 'Jurassic Coast'. We're going looking for fossils this half-term holiday!

    You sound like Mom of the Year to me!


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