Tuesday, August 31, 2010

country justice on Crap Corner, WI

There's a pretty farm that I pass a few times a week while en route to the grocery store/dojo/post office/hardware store/library. It's a dairy farm owned by a very clean and tidy Dutch farmer--he's been on this property for decades.

Isn't it a sweet little farm?

If you look closely at his cornfield by the nearest intersection, you'll note this gigantic pile of cow manure.

The big brown blob is the hill o' feces.

Across the intersection is a supper club--it has served Friday night fish fries and hosted wedding receptions and banquets for decades, too. It used to be the Starlite club, but new owners came along a few years ago and began making upgrades. They added a patio to the back of the building to accommodate smokers. They've pushed the "bar" by adding concerts in the back parking lot, annual hog wrestling, and most recently, cage fighting.

Green Girl still thinks the place is a dive, even though she's only been there once in the last 5 years.

This sudden influx of loud noises on sultry summer nights makes the farmer mad. He objects to the late hours, the obscene language of the cage fight announcers, and, I suspect, the traffic pulling in and out all week long. In protest (after going to a town hall meeting to complain), he's piling up cow manure along his property line--directly across the road and behind the club's parking lot.

A view from the Momvan of the edge of the club's back parking lot. That second pile of manure keeps getting bigger and bigger.

Every day I drive past and hold my nose and chuckle. And I wonder what will give out first--the club owner's patience and creativity or the farmer's stubborn will? One thing is certain: the farmer's stockpiles of manure won''t give out as long as he's got cows in his barn.

26 comments:

  1. In a few months all that crap will freeze and then it won't smell so much.

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  2. Love it! That's funny. People just can't get along sometimes. It's interesting that zoning laws should allow a city business right next to an agro business.

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  3. Our local little bar just got new owners...crap bands...people outside yelling at 2 in the morning...I wish I had a pile of crap like that!!!

    Oh, and I'm willing to bet the old dutch farmer will win.

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  4. That's hilarious.
    Thanks for the visual aids! :)

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  5. Go Farmer!!! Hope the manure is fresh.

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  6. Now THAT is stinkin' hilarious. Get it? Stinkin'? hehe

    I love the farmer's will.

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  7. Stubborn, smelly, and creative. You've got to love the Dutch!

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  8. AWESOME! I'm rooting for the farmer :)

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  9. This makes me miss Minnesota.

    What is a cage fight?

    I can't decide who I want to win this -- the Dutch farmer or the supper club.

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  10. Oh wow - that is so funny!! I love it! That is a great idea!

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  11. Heh heh heh. Now THAT'S creative revenge. Keep us posted!

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  12. oh my word. i want to be that farmer's bff.

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  13. This sure beats our parking wars with our neighbors!

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  14. That? Is awesome. I hope he wins this one.

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  15. I've heard of a pissing match but never a manure battle. Love it.

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  16. That is hilarious! And honestly, I don't blame him.

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  17. I shouldn't be laughing, but I can't help it. I love the creativity of this farmer - and it's not costing him a penny!

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  18. omg-I love this!!! What a creative way for the farmer to show his unhappiness!!
    Point to the farmer on this one!!

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  19. What a brilliant means of protesting a craptacular situation.

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  20. The title of this post is absolutely priceless... love it!!
    * = p

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  21. Haha!!! That farmer is genius! I love him! :)

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  22. This little tale pretty much makes me want to pull up to the property line and add my own "manure" into the farmer's effort to make the Dodo's back off.

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  23. I admire his creativity! Do the new owners have updated zoning permits for all their nonsense?

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Spill it, reader.