Opening Day found Brewers fans hopeful.
Opening Day found Green Girl ruminating on the unfortunate choices baseball players make.
Green Girl isn't referring to "performance enhancing drugs." Nor is she talking about players fussing with their batting gloves. (Although that makes her as batty as when they chew and spit.)
She's not even going to discuss their unflattering tight pants.
Unflattering tight pants that even the coaches wear.
Baseball is a unique sport in that it's not played against a clock.
It's unique because it's the only sport where the coach wears a team uniform (including those unflattering tight pants).
No, Green Girl made another observation:
Baseball players make uniquely terrible choices about their hair.
Particularly their facial hair.
Muttonchops and knee breeches can be hot.
Players, do your fans a favor.
Take some pages from the Jane Austen playbook.
Jane Austen's heroes makes muttonchops and kneebreeches work.
Study these photos and get thee to a razor.