Thursday, September 22, 2011

hating on fall

A bunch of you asked about my harsh feelings towards autumn--the season of scarecrows, pumpkins, spiced cider and colorful leaves. What's to hate about it? I'll tell you what's to hate about it.

For starters, I'm Green Girl in Wisconsin and in my state fall leads to winter--5 months of bitter cold, slush, ice, snow and misery. We're shut inside for half the year, struggling through knee-deep snow as we navigate our daily lives, bundling up to head out, stripping layers to return indoors. Our cars are cold and start hard, our recycling bins get frozen into snowbanks, we live like rodents in hours of darkness with short days and long nights. The simplest tasks--going to the store for a gallon of milk, retrieving the mail, walking the dog--become Major Endeavors when the temps dip below zero and the roads turn slippery. Winter's a massive pain in the ass and fall means it's coming.

If that's not enough of a reason, fall's also a season of death. Those crisp days mean crisp plants. I'm always watching the weather forecast and deciding whether to water and cover my vegetables to eke a few more weeks out of the harvest OR dig the works up. Inevitably, the years I dig up my garden and give up, the fall weather becomes balmy and warm. Fall's a total crap-shoot, a gardening gamble that makes this girl crabby. Fall means the end of flavorful tomatoes and crunchy cucumbers.

Of course, since I garden, fall means the death of all the flowers, too. Sure, we've got the bright mums and asters, but it's a last hurrah before the petals and leaves turn black and decompose.

Fall means the start of school, the end of lazy August days floating in the pool and staying up late. It means rushing around, sticking to the schedule and homework. Fall means layering sweaters, wearing socks and digging in the cupboard for gloves and hats.

There you have it, reader. Fall bites--I'd take spring and summer all year long if I could. You can argue all you want about pretty colors, handknit scarves, football, apples and the rest of it. This gal prefers daffodils and sunshine, the promise of new life and fresh starts.

My instincts are to flee or hibernate when fall arrives. I think the geese have the right idea--fly to warmer climates and wait it out. Or the bears--eat a ton of food and hunker down to sleep through winter.

27 comments:

  1. I think you should flee to another state. Midwest weather never agreed with me. We have a much shorter and milder winter here in Virginia and perhaps that's why I love autumn... Who knows... LOL

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  2. I couldn't handle your winters. I hate winter so much - even though ours isn't anything like yours.

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  3. Move South.

    Fall is my favorite season!

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  4. I'd hate it too if I had to go through a snowy winter.

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  5. When I was younger I often thought of moving to Madison, but knew I would never be able to tolerate your winters.

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  6. There you go. At any moment in Time, you have the freedom to become Green Girl in Mendocino! Green Girl in Tennessee! Swamp Girl in Louisiana! SOme folks are even more harcore, and they just buckle down, man...invest in top-qual snuggly bundle-gear, shop those catalogs for people who live in ARCTIC regions but need the COMFORT of the freekin' Bahamas...*heehee!
    dos centavos en nuevo mexico * : )

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  7. As DOTR always says "if I lived in Nebraska, I'd probably be an alcoholic".

    Fall in Georgia is awesome. Summer actually bites the big one here.

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  8. I can understand why you'd be unhappy about the arrival of fall. If I had winters like yours, I'd probably be weeping right now.

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  9. But! Without fall and winter, you'd never have spring and daffodils!

    Okay, I won't try to convince you otherwise --after all, there are people who actually want to live in Texas. There's room for all kinds. :-)

    One of the things I like about fall is that nature goes to sleep or dies back. By this time of year, I've used up all my enthusiasm for tomato plants and flowers. I want to stay inside, cuddled in fleece and work on puzzles with Emma. It's like I need the down time as much as the plants. I agree that winter is a bit too long, and longer for you since you're farther north. However, I think the experience of winter is what allows me to enjoy spring so much.

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  10. You'd take spring and summer because your summers aren't 100 degrees for months on end and humid. I'd take autumn all year. It's like spring, only different colors and Christmas coming. :)

    Thanks so much for posting my widget!

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  11. I'm torn... i much prefer spring and fall - the temps are milder (usually) and not nearly as extreme as they are during summer and winter. i hate the snow and i hate the triple-digit temps for days and days and days (we set and broke more than one record this summer - and set some records last winter, too). so... it's a crap-shoot either way.

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  12. Yeah, I used to be suspicious of fall in Connecticut -- all those bright leaves were just a diversion so that winter could sneak up on us.

    Still, as they told me in CT, "You can either ski on it or shovel it. You choose." Make the best of it.

    We still have the A/C on down here, and I still won't venture out into the sunshine. I think Lancaster County, PA is the best location for all of us.

    (Besides, you wouldn't appreciate spring and summer as much if you lived in Arkansas -- and you know it!)

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  13. Up in Canada, we have much the same problem. I don't like spring however... weeks and months of rain and slush and mud, and then the skeeters. Oy vay the skeeters!!! This year they were particularly bad.

    I prefer summer and autumn, only because it's dry and not too cold. But yes, if August were to last all year, I'd be the happiest camper ever.

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  14. {{{hugs}}} I confess, I like fall. The smells, the beauty, the harvest - Thanksgiving ranks up there as a favorite holiday, too.

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  15. I didn't just dislike Fall and Winter. I got seriously depressed. Now that I live in a warm climate I'm so excited when October comes. I can decorate to my heart's delight, but still go for walks in my shorts and t-shirts where I see flowers blooming and have the windows open.

    I'm willing to put up with 4 months of sweating to get 8 months of Happy, Happy, Happy!

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  16. Whew, you convinced me - though I'm guessing your spring & summer are sweeter because of those winters. In these parts, I think winter is one month too long - I dread all 28 days of February.

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  17. I get the feeling you could be happy in San Diego!

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  18. God, I hate the cold. Your winter sounds worse than mine, but in general, winter SUCKS!

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  19. Amen, amen, AMEN!! I wore socks today for the first time in 4 months and it made me grumpy. Funny how wearing socks doesn't keep my toes warm.

    One of my most unfavorite things about winter is all of the gear. It's cumbersome, time-consuming, and awkward to deal with the heavy coats, gloves, hats, scarves, and boots.

    But I think the worst thing of all for me (and that's really saying something) is that there is no color. Everything is white, grey, brown, dead. I'm already dreaming of next June when the world will be verdant and lush once again.

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  20. Here in the Pac NW our seasons are mild. That's one reason I love the seasons. They're easy.

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  21. I love fall. Love. But I loathe winter. One month of winter is fine. The five or six months we actually get makes me suicidal. I really should move south. If my ENTIRE family weren't here I would have moved LONG ago. Though, there are many things I love about WI despite the nasty winters.

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  22. I'm with you Green Girl! I am moving south the minute my kids are out of college! I only have 12 or 13 more years of Wisconsin Winters.

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  23. yes but... It's not cold YET. It's not dark for 13 hours/day YET. It's not all white and blustery YET. If we didn't have fall (and, even more so, winter) we wouldn't appreciate the spring and summer.

    And let's be honest for a minute. Summer gets to be a little long, don't you think? I mean, how much sunshine and heat and pool floating can you really endure?

    (just trying to gear myself up for a long stretch here - it's a mental game, after all!)

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  24. Wow. When you put it that way, I can see why you hate fall. Ice and death? Yuck.

    So Cal forever! :)

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  25. Feeling a little better about the heat wave we just endured. Because we had a few icy, snowy weeks last year, and that was sufficient for the novelty to wear off making the idea of months of bitter cold sound really, really icky.

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  26. I think I like the idea of fall. The pictures of beautiful warm-sunny-but-with-a-hint-of-crispness-in-the-air days, when I might pull out a sweater. In reality (and this is why I moved from the frozen northern tundra to even-weathered SoCal) I like my weather to be warms and sunny year-round. 90 is too hot, 55 is too cold. I miss the changing colors f the leaves, but maybe I can just see pictures of that on your blog... ;-)

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Spill it, reader.