I confess, I've been tempted, SORELY tempted to do some wicked things. Yesterday I was driving home with Mr. G in the Momvan when this woman began aggressively tailgating me. On a county highway. Where there were no other drivers. I was traveling at the excessive speed of 62 MPH (posted speed was 55), and she insisted on staying about 4 feet from my rear bumper. I kept waiting for her to pass me, but she didn't. I kept waiting for her to jump into my trunk because it was obvious she really, really wanted to be inside the rear of the Momvan (if her proximity were any indication), but she didn't. She just wanted to drive uncomfortably close to me.
I really, really hate tailgaters. They make me nervous. It's a terribly unsafe way to drive. They endanger themselves and others. I kept glaring at her in my rear view mirror, but she crept closer.
Then I noticed how she swerved erratically from time to time and kept looking down. At a phone? At a cheeseburger? At a copy of Tailgating for Idiots?
I tried to keep my cool. I kept talking to Mr. G and tried to squelch the urge to tap my brakes. If I braked--hard or quickly, this woman would end up embedded in my tailpipe. Oh, the temptation! I could get revenge on this nasty tailgater AND score a new van out of the deal. But my kid's safety ruled out this tactic.
When I noticed a cluster of cars coming towards us, I slowed down--impossible for her to pass now and frustrating as heck to follow me at 53 MPH, right? The posted speed limit reduces to 45 MPH, so I coasted past the sign at 40. The road widens at this point and I made sure to hog the center, preventing her from blowing by on my right. I puttered towards the intersection at 35 MPH, feeling slightly vindicated because I was making her suffer. Then I watched her tear into the subdivision just before our intersection. I resisted doing the truly evil thing and slamming on my brakes on that highway.
This morning I had another chance to choose goodness instead of evil. Mr. D was heckling me a bit and I escaped to avoid him. The phone rang and I ran to pick it up. On the line was a solicitor--asking for Mr. D. Oh, how I wanted to hand the phone to him! The devil on my shoulder urged me to pay him back with a little quality time listening to some stranger's pitch for a donation. I closed my eyes and allowed the glow of human kindness to shine through my clouded emotions--and I told the caller Mr. D was unavailable. Goodness prevailed once more.
Spill it, reader. When have you made the choice to be good lately?